Why do I still feel tied to my ex?

A relationship’s intensity can stick around longer than its duration, especially when the ending left you with unanswered questions. Feeling strongly connected does not tell you what your ex feels now, though. It may help to treat the feeling as a sign that your own mind is still processing the breakup, rather than as evidence of a connection between you.

Since they said they do not want to reopen the relationship, keep respecting that boundary and try not to seek another sign or explanation from them. You have already cut down on reminders, which is useful. The next step may be less about forcing yourself to stop thinking of them and more about building routines and plans that are not organized around the breakup.

If thinking in terms of energy or cords is meaningful to you, you can use it as a personal metaphor for attachment. But if repeated cord-cutting rituals leave you checking whether the feeling is gone, they might keep your attention fixed on it. You could try a simple grounding practice instead, then gently return to whatever you were doing without measuring whether you feel fully detached.

This sounds exhausting, and getting support from a therapist could be worth considering, particularly if the thoughts are disrupting sleep, work, or other relationships. You do not need to decide that anything is spiritually wrong before asking for help. A therapist can help you work with grief and recurring thoughts without dismissing how real and intense they feel.